Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Just pee around me
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
