In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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