I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize