I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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