He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
