North Korea, Best Korea!
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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