we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
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