i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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