this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
The air taste purple.
Randomize
