they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
