what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Randomize