i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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