I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
