she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize