I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
