idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
