We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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