Me too!
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Randomize
