Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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