What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
