i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
