You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
