apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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