Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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