Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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