I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
