some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
