5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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