the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
