spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize