We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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