im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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