i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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