I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Randomize