Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
