he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
