I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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