i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize