I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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