I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
