He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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