she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
