My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
