just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
