Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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