This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize