did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
This baby is an asshole
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Randomize
