he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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