He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
