you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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