the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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