normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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